Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny Organization: Stanford University From: Denise.Shoemaker@forsythe.stanford.edu (REEEOOW Pfft Pfft) Subject: Green Eggs and Hamlet Keywords: chuckle Approved: funny-request@clari.net Message-ID: Date: Mon, 26 May 97 19:30:02 EDT Lines: 32 [Note - author unknown, making the rounds - ed.] Green Eggs and Hamlet I ask to be or not to be. That is the question I ask of me. This sullied life, it makes me shudder. My uncle's boffing dear sweet mother. Would I, could I take me life? Could I, should I end this strife? Should I jump out of a plane? Or throw myself before a train? Should I from a cliff just leap? Could I put myself to sleep? Shoot myself ot take some poison? Maybe try self immolation? To shudder off this mortal coil, I could stab myself with a fencing foil. Slash my wrists while in the bath? Would it end my angst and wrath? To sleep, to drea, now there's the rub. I could drop a toaster in my tub. Would all be glad if I were dead? Could I perhaps kill them instead? This line of thought takes consideration- For I'm the king of procrastination. -- Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to funny@clari.net. Sponsored by ClariNet Communications Corp. (http://www.clari.net) If you post instead of mailing, it screws up the reply-address sometimes. Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply.